Molly hits all the medical professionals in one week.

I know I haven't written in quite some time, but yes, I am alive -- just barely. It all started one week ago when I bit down on some salad and roasted chicken for lunch and chipped/cracked my bottom front tooth and loosened it something fierce. Call the dentist and the dentist said, "No mo eatin with a fork while you mad." Go in and get the tooth fixed, well, sorta. He fixed the chip and crack, but he couldn't do anything about it being loose. It's either going to live or die which means root canal if it dies and a crooked tooth if it lives.
Then I go to the chiropractor for a free consultation that my mom got, which includes a free massage. Go into the doctor and the doctor says, "No mo carryin your computer bag on your shoulder." I still haven't gone back to get my massage or the X-ray results. I'm a little afraid of what he'll say next.
Then on Saturday I'm out doing some yard work with my neighbor in my back yard and fix the fence out back and mow the lawn and the lawnmower gets stuck so I grab a hold of the lawnmower to jimmy it loose and grab the motor thing on top. This sheer of pain surged through my brain and into my entire body. I've never felt that pain in my life. So after discussing it with a few people, I decide that I can't handle the pain and better go into the doc-in-the box. The doctor said, "Yep, sho nuf, you've got 2nd degree burns on the palm of your right hand. No mo typing for 14 days." I said, "Oh, hwell no. Give me something strong, because I aint gunna be outta work for 14 days." Some antibacterial cream, gauze pads and pain pills later, I'm on my way to recovery.
Rainy came over and brought all of her stash of medical burn supplies from her accident and I'm feeling so fantastic tonight. Haven't taken a pain pill all day. I'm a little tired and it's starting to hurt a little bit, so I'm going to take one tonight. But all in all, I think I hit every medical profession so I think I'm good to go for a while, don't ya think?

Say What?

Here's an excerpt of a doctor's deposition that I did.
Answer: "On 3/22/89, a lumbar MRI exam was obtained, showing grade I spondylitic spondylolisthesis at L5 and S1 with secondary bilateral intervertebral neural foraminal stenosis and compression of the L5 nerve roots bilaterally."
What I wrote, "lumbar MRI exam was obtained, showing grade one, holy crap, at L5 and S1 with second elementary bilateral, what the hell was that garbage, and compression of the nerve roots."
Whew, I'm glad they didn't have me read back that answer.

Boo-Yahhhhhhh

Boo-Yahhhhh - Here is the cutest players on the team. Kellen Moore and Coach Pete.

BOISE..............STATE................

Me and Gabe's view from our seats without zooming on my camera.

My sister Rainy got me season tickets for my birthday. This is the reason why I'm at the games!

Yesterday was the first home game and it was AAAAmazing. It was so fun. I can't wait to cheer on the Boise State Broncos this season!

This is a picture of me and Gabe being funny before the game. Notice his ticket behind his ear.

Game Day!

HELLLLLLLO BRONCO FANS!!!! It's game day!!! WHAOOOOOOOO!!!
Thought I'd post a picture of myself on this glorious day. So far I am down 16 pounds and feel great. By the way, I kinda think I look like my dad in this picture, don't ya think?

Who's Ready for Some Bronco Football?

Man, August came and went fast. Here it is already the 1st of September and I'm ready. For those of you who read my blog, but don't know, my birthday present from my sister was season tickets for the BSU football games. I know, right? Whoot, Whoot! I've been gearing up and wetting my lips to get my whistle just perfect, you know, LOUD, crisp and clear. I mean, I want Coach Pete to know that I am whistling not just for BSU to win, but at him, too! And I've been going to the gym to tighten up my stomach muscles just in case my neighbors next to me need a U or something painted on my belly. GO BRONCOS!!!!

I'm 30 what?

Turning 30 what today, I feel it. I woke up at 5:45 to go to the gym by 6:30. Man, I can honestly say that mornings are not my strong point. It's only 11:50 and I want to crawl back in bed, but I've got lunch plans with my friend Cindy and then dinner plans with Jody. Maybe I can squeeze in a quick nap. I'm truly grateful for my friends and family on this happy day.

Measurements

Last Saturday my trainer was back from her European vacation and called me up and said come visit me. I went in and got measured and weighed. I have only lost 5 pounds and 4 percent body fat. It was disappointing, I ain't even gunna lie; however, I kept saying to myself, it's okay because this is a lifestyle change, not big fat loser. I wanted to know if there was something I could take to help boost my metabolism or some suggestions about my workouts. I bought some different vitamin complexes, and starting today, going to up my cardio workout 15 minutes -- now being an hour and 15 minutes. I'm going to try my way for another 7 weeks and if something hasn't happened in that time, I will have to hire her as I don't know what else to do. So for right now, there is no picture. You will have to wait at least until I reach 20 pounds lost, not just a measly 5.

Delay

So I know ya'll have been patiently waiting for the past 6-weeks reveal pictures, but I've lost my original picture when my computer crashed, which I thought was on my other computer, but I can't find it and I haven't had someone take a "today" picture. I haven't quite trained BoBo to focus in on me and press the button yet. So for right now I'm not going to post a picture. I'm not sure how much I've lost yet because the one trainer has been on vacation and I don't want to know until she comes back. So please hold......and after you're done holding, please hold some more......

Weigh-In Saturday

Well, Saturday I will weigh in at the gym to see how much weight I've lost so far. I will have been going for 5 weeks. I'm very excited to see the scale. I think I can see it in my face, but my clothes aren't fitting me really any different yet. I am going to post my before picture along with a 5-week picture and then every month after that. So be prepared, these pictures actually might be PG-13 rated because they are so horrific!

Mom & Me = Fun

Mom was able to come over for the 4th of July and hang out. We shopped at the mall with Jody on Monday, went to the bookstore and sports store, came home, had a barbecue with the Fair family having burgers, slaw, grapes, chocolate dipped strawberries, chips and topping it off with root beer floats. It was so fun. After Jody and the family left, mom and I settled down to watch the fireworks on TV. We were so tired that we just decided to watch them on TV. We started out watching the DC fireworks, the New York City fireworks and then ended with the Boston fireworks. We decided that we wanted to see the New York City fireworks show before we die. IT WAS HONESTLY THE BEST SHOW!! Then yesterday we shopped at a consignment clothing store and got some of the best bargains ever! Went to a quilting shop, stopped and got an ice cream cone at "Tasty Treats" (Fancy Freeze), came home to watch Casey Anthony's NOT GUILTY VERDICT (we won't discuss that), had a little nap, and then went to a movie. I mean, it was the best two days with mom ever. We had such a fun time! Thanks, Mom, for enjoying the 4th of July festivities with me!

BoBo's Haircut

I had the most brilliant idea that I would shave BoBo instead of taking him to the salon (and yes, he does know what the "salon" means) I would buy a pair of cheap clippers and do the job myself. I mean, how hard could it really be? It's just a dog. So I buy a $15.00 pair of clippers on Saturday and give him a bath that night so that by Sunday morning we're both ready to shave. Well, let's just start out by giving you the whole picture, okay. First of all, I don't have an electrical cord big enough to stretch outside so we do it on a sheet in the middle of the living room. I start in. buzzzzzzz, buzzzzzzz, buzzzzzz BoBo is doing great just sitting there acting like he's in the salon. More buzzzzz, buzzzzzz, buzzzzz. I'm thinking to myself, man this looks like crap. Why isn't this working? After I had just about completely shaved him, almost an hour later, it kicks in that I've been shaving him the entire time wrong. I was going against the grain when I shulda been going with the grain of his hair (insert Homer Simpson DOH here). Here are a couple of pictures of BoBo's after. I'm pretty sure he was thinking to himself, "Mom, I look stupid."

Sisterly Advice

The other day when I was talking to Jo, I told her how I wanted a greasy hamburger and fries and chocolate cake and candy. I never did go and get all of that crap, but she said, "One day of eating bad didn't make you fat."

Movin On Up

By the title of my post today, ya'll are probably thinking I won the lottery or something, right, "Movin on up"? Nah, I didn't win the lottery -- at least not yet, according to my fortuneteller and "lucky" numbers on my fortune cookie. I'm talking about jogging. Last night after working out for a week and a couple days, I decided to jog. I wasn't even sure if my legs could do it. I started out a little shaky, but then off they went. Of course it was only 2 1/2 minutes, but then I caught my breath and did another 2 minutes. Isn't that amazing? Isn't it pathetic that I'm excited I jogged yesterday for 4 1/2 minutes in a 60-minute workout? Well, all I can say is I'm movin on up!

Ssssshhhhh, It's a Secret

Today I had to sign a confidentiality agreement before the deposition started so that I would not talk about the case. At first I was a little hesitant to sign the waiver, but then I was like, oooh, this better be juicy. It was. The end.

Ooowee Day 3

Well, I'm on day 3 of not smoking and doing fantastic. What isn't doing fantastic is my fat belly. Apparently underneath my fat is some muscles I never new I had. They decided to come forward and say to me, "Hello. I'm your muscles. I know you forgot about me, it's okay, cause you know I'm here now." As I tried to roll out of bed, I thought, holy hell Karen Lezamiz (volleyball joke.) For those of you who don't know Karen Lezamiz, she was the assistant coach who for the first two weeks of volleyball would pound you into the ground with the training camp. After the first two days you could barely sit on the toilet, by day three your feet had blisters, and by day four you wanted to call in sick to practice. At least it's a good pain, not a Karen pain.

Lifestyle Change

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I have finally done it. I have joined a gym. I never thought I would join any gym, but I joined the one and only Meat Market Gym. That's right, I joined Gold's Gym on Sunday and have now had my third workout. You know that song, "What a feelin (da, da, da, da) What a feelin" yeah, that's right, I LOVE IT!!!! I'm back on the wagon with no smoking. My first full day again and have had only two cravings. I know now that I will not smoke again because working out and smoking and asthma don't go hand in hand. Mom thinks I should take a before and after picture and submit it into the Today Show (I think the segment is called the Joy Fit Club.) Anyway, my goal that I'm announcing to the world is to weigh 134 pounds by my birthday when I will turn 34 in 2012. Thanks Gold's Gym and my friend Cindy for convincing me to change my life. ;)

Holy Poo!!! (rated pg-13)

Well, this morning when I awoke I decided that I would do a little cleaning and laundry in between working. So I gathered up my laundry and headed downstairs. I found water (what I thought). So I called up my property management company and said, "I don't know if this qualifies as an 'emergency', but I've got water in my basement." The lady said, "How much?" I said, "Well, there's about an inch and in some places more." She said she would have the plumber contact me. Within five minutes the plumber called. "What's the problem?" he said. I told him what was going on, and he said "I'll be there in a few hours." "Okay. Great." So I did my dishes and started kinda straightening up my place. My house was in need of attention since I've been ignoring it because I've been so busy with work and I wanted to make a good impression of how clean I was -- I just shut my bedroom doors and bathroom, I mean, why would he need to go in there? It was the basement that had the problem.
After I had finished tiding up the living room and kitchen I went downstairs to assess the situation. HOLY SHIT BALLS OF FIRE the water was deeper and spreading to the back wall where my stuff was. I called up Scoe and asked him if he could come help me move my stuff from the basement to outside or something. He said, "Look around and tell me what you see?" I said, "Water." He's like, "Are you sure it's water?" I'm thinking to myself at that moment, well, it does smell like poo. I walk over to the drain and sure as shit (literally) was tp and poo. I just about threw up. I yelled, "It's shit! It's shit! Holy Shit." He's like "Come and get me and call your plumber and get him over there now."
I call up the plumber and said, "Um, so the situation has changed now. There's poo downstairs." He quickly said, "I will load up my truck and be there soon." I run and get Scoe and he assesses the situation. He's like I think your stuff will be fine, but let's scoot it all the way to the back and throw down some bad towels.
By this time the plumber comes and assesses the situation. "Well, I ain't got that big 'a snake. I'm gunna have to call my buddy." The buddy doesn't come for an hour. Well, buddy comes and assesses the situation and cracks out his industrial-sized snake. It took them to take off my back door and grunt to get this, what looked like, 150-pound snake on a metal rack with wheels that took 2 people to get it downstairs. After working at it for an hour they decided that it wasn't working and decided to go upstairs to the bathroom. Now, remember, I decided to shut every door upstairs because they hadn't been cleaned yet. But then the thought occurred to me, plumbers are only called when there's something havoc going on -- they've surely seen worse. So they take the toilet out and go at it that way. Almost 80 feet, they said, almost to the street was my clog. Something that had been waiting to happen for 10 years. After they put everything back, I notice their footprints and hand prints all over my house -- People, it's Poo. It's not dirt, it's POOOOOOOP. I have been cleaning this afternoon shaking my head, getting mad, swearing, but then I think on the bright side..... My house doesn't have that old musty dirty sewage smell anymore, wa-hoo!!!!

Hip-Bo-Pig-o'no-amus

Easter came and went and so did me and Jody, Spencer, BoBo and Gus -- we went down to Richfield for a quick overnighter.
Long story short: We sat down for lunch around 1:00 and BoBo decided he needed some lunch too and went over to Sid and Kristen's barn and ate about 15 pounds of dog food. He was huge by the time the food had settled in his stomach. I knew it was going to be a very long drive home. Well, just past King Hill he started to throw up a little on the seat. I pull off the road let him out hoping he would just throw it all up, but nope, he just had the upset stomach. We get home finally and I put him in the back yard. Thinking he'd been out there long enough to get rid of more, bring him back into the house as I run to the store really quick. He threw up in the house. I get home and he just looks miserable and he's got this look about him like, "I'm so sorry, mom. I couldn't hold it. Please don't hit me." Of course I couldn't get mad at him. I mean, after all, he saved me from getting a ticket for speeding (going 87) by pulling off and letting him go potty. Last night he was up 6 times needing to go outside. We were both pretty tired today. Hopefully he will do fine tomorrow as I have 2 jobs in Eagle and may not be able to come home and let him out. Pray that we get some sleep tonight as his gas is killing me!

Dad

Happy Birthday, Dad!!! Last year, Mom threw him a huge party that was so awesome that included me dressing up as "Cleatus" and putting on a magic show. This year, I'm just going to post a couple memories I have about my dad.
Pulling off dad's socks. Even as a little kid I remember pulling off dad's socks, and believe me, there's a certain way it HAS to be done -- you know, pulling from the toes, but you've got to scoot the sock down a little so you don't pull him off the couch.
Going to Twin to that place that had the horse out front for some sort of supplies for the horses and getting to eat at Burger King and actually get fries of our own and a drink.
Getting to go down into the canyon to Blue Lakes and golf. I didn't get to go that much because I was so little and took too much time to hit.
Driving the flatbed truck with a trailer attached with a tractor on top from Mud Lake to Arco at age 12 while he took a nap.
Running to Shoshone to get something from the Co-Op just so I could drive the flatbed at age 14.
When all the kids were gone and it was just me, me helping feed in the wintertime and getting the tractor stuck -- HE WAS MAD!!!!
The countless times when somebody would call or stop by in the middle of the night saying, "Your cows are out."
Those are just a few memories I have, but I just wanted to say that I love my Dad and appreciate the sacrifices he has made for me. Oh, and I just love his laugh and smile. Lately when he laughs, he laughs so hard he gets red in the face and his whole body moves up and down -- like father, like daughter. Happy Birthday Dad!